Sticks and Stones...and Comforting Hypocrisy
by Nina Wilson Jones, Washington Shores Presbyterian and CFP Anti-Racism Committee Member
“What’s in a name?”
“It’s not what they call you, it’s what you answer to.”
and “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
These phrases often soothe our feelings when called out of our names, described harshly, or facing threats. Your familiarity with each indicates that you may have affirmed yourself with one of them during hurtful moments in arguments or life overall.
But today, words are used to misinform, manipulate, scrutinize, and abuse others with such frequency that most believers are unaware of how far this pulls us away from our daily walk with Christ. We have been conditioned to accept some phrases as acceptable, and if someone uses other phrases in a manner that disturbs our usual language, we are defensive. We like to believe we are unsusceptible to this, but we are.
Try listening to how you speak from the perspective of another gender, ethnicity, faith, or age. “Kiss me, I’m Irish!” is harmless, right? If so, why is “Black power!” scary? “Kung flu” or “old fool” is just kidding, OK? “The only good Indian is…” is an outdated movie line! Except they continue to cause certain people harm, even violence. Do you carefully choose your words before speaking or don’t ever give any consideration to the origin, audience, or impact of your words? Do these words – immigrant, queer, Muslim, Jewish, or feminist – cause you to feel threatened? If you are even slightly disturbed by these words in conversation, consider what you’ve been conditioned to believe about the term and learn more to be better informed. Because different audiences may hear what you say differently. (Look up the origins of terms like picnic, cakewalk, paddy wagon, and peanut gallery to really begin to understand the corrosive impact of common language.)
Believers should be genuinely concerned about personal hypocrisy, especially worldly language that we internalize in our hearts. God’s Word warns us against it (1 Peter2:2) and society sorely needs us to set a positive example for resolving differences and building His Kingdom in the earth, in our congregation, and our families. Because what we say shows what we honestly think and believe about others.
“It’s not what they call you, it’s what you answer to.”
and “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
These phrases often soothe our feelings when called out of our names, described harshly, or facing threats. Your familiarity with each indicates that you may have affirmed yourself with one of them during hurtful moments in arguments or life overall.
But today, words are used to misinform, manipulate, scrutinize, and abuse others with such frequency that most believers are unaware of how far this pulls us away from our daily walk with Christ. We have been conditioned to accept some phrases as acceptable, and if someone uses other phrases in a manner that disturbs our usual language, we are defensive. We like to believe we are unsusceptible to this, but we are.
Try listening to how you speak from the perspective of another gender, ethnicity, faith, or age. “Kiss me, I’m Irish!” is harmless, right? If so, why is “Black power!” scary? “Kung flu” or “old fool” is just kidding, OK? “The only good Indian is…” is an outdated movie line! Except they continue to cause certain people harm, even violence. Do you carefully choose your words before speaking or don’t ever give any consideration to the origin, audience, or impact of your words? Do these words – immigrant, queer, Muslim, Jewish, or feminist – cause you to feel threatened? If you are even slightly disturbed by these words in conversation, consider what you’ve been conditioned to believe about the term and learn more to be better informed. Because different audiences may hear what you say differently. (Look up the origins of terms like picnic, cakewalk, paddy wagon, and peanut gallery to really begin to understand the corrosive impact of common language.)
Believers should be genuinely concerned about personal hypocrisy, especially worldly language that we internalize in our hearts. God’s Word warns us against it (1 Peter2:2) and society sorely needs us to set a positive example for resolving differences and building His Kingdom in the earth, in our congregation, and our families. Because what we say shows what we honestly think and believe about others.
